1. The Chinese Restaurant
|This photo is from my bachelorette party circa 2007|
But I'm holding sushi so I decided it could work.
What can I say? I needed a photo
Now for the story: He's sitting there, mowing some lo mein noodles, watching rescue bots on Steve's i-pad when BAM! the biggest pee I've ever seen in my life soaks the booth, his pants, socks, sneakers etc. We had to carry him out barefoot. I'm pretty sure we're never allowed back.
2. The Liquor Store
Pick him up at school, grab a happy meal, and run to liquor store for cheap bottle of red wine that I forgot to buy for the beef stew I was making for dinner. I walk three steps away from the child and hear: "Mama..pee-pee." There he is standing in a puddle on the mat next to the cash register. The lady working was less than pleased. I offered to clean it up, but made the mistake of asking for carpet cleaner. Apparently this is the first time someone urinated in her store and she never had use for carpet cleaner before. She made sure she told me that (twice) and proceeded to give me a look that said "you shouldn't have your snot nose kids in my liquor store anyway." I asked if she wanted me to spray her carpet with the windex she put on the counter and she said: "you better spray it with something before it stinks to high heaven." Ok I get it, you're pissed (no pun intended) but it's not like I just peed in your store. The kid is three and he is adorable and accidents happens. I guess I'm going to have to start buying my booze somewhere else. Her loss. They might go out of business because this mama drinks a lot of wine - I mean if this incident proved anything its that I need my booze more than anyone else. When we got to the car I said to Colt: "boy that was embarrassing huh?" To which he replied, "no" and smiled that cute little chicklet tooth smile at me. Super. I'm going to need a new liquor store. Stat.
Hope you're having a terrific Tuesday and that no one pees on your stuff.